Dogs – Brianne Larson

The hardest goodbye to your dog

For the longest time, I dreaded the day we would need to put down our golden retriever, Tucker. Just thinking about it would fill my eyes with tears. I would think, “How can I live knowing he is no longer with us?” It was an extremely uncomfortable thought, and having been through a loss like it before, I deeply feared the event that was inevitable in my life.

Dogs are with us only for a short while. It’s not fair. It’s not fair that they come into our lives and make us love them so much, and then just as we have created so many fantastic memories, they get old, tired and sore. They always leave us too soon. When they leave us, it’s like losing a child or a sibling. At least for me, that’s how it feels.

Tucker the golden retriever — Happy smiles from Tucker

Dogs are such lovable creatures. A dog’s main goal is to please you. Your happiness makes their day! You develop the most special relationship–something that will never be replaced, not by another person, not by another dog. It’s one-of-a-kind.

Making the heart wrenching decision to say goodbye is the worst. You question it. Maybe make the appointment, then cancel. You’re waiting for the sign that it’s time. Should it be when he can no longer stand up? Or when he starts to go potty in the house? When he refuses to eat? You’re hoping your dog gives you some sort of sign so that you can justify your actions. In the back of your mind, you wish he would just choose his own time.

Tucker (whom I actually called Beau or Beaubi since I tend to develop quirky nicknames for my pets) is the second dog I’ve had to say goodbye to in my life. The first dog was a golden retriever named Duke. It doesn’t get easier, and the guilt doesn’t go away.

Tucker lived with my parents and was with me all through my 20s. While he was technically their dog, he was my baby. I raised him the summer before my sophomore year of college. I got up with him every night when he was a little pup. And let me tell you, he became a little duckling that truly thought I was his mother! Leaving for college in the fall was tough, but I was able to develop a bond with him that would last his entire life.

I look back on all those years and remember the moments I spent with Beaubi. He was my rock throughout my twenties. All the ups and downs. When I would cry (in secret), he would put all his weight on me and lick those tears away. He also did so many things that still make me smile.

When it’s time to say goodbye, you put a bookmark in your story, but you never get to finish it. Making memories is over. After it happens, this feeling of loss is overwhelming. Your dog is gone, but to top it off, you’re losing the opportunity for anything new in that path of your life. And I just want to keep writing pages of that story.

Dogs come and go too quickly. They are around just long enough to hit some major milestones in our lives. Then it’s their time to move on. Their unconditional love is so powerful and all you hope is that they know how much you love them in return.

Now that Tucker/Beau/Beaubi is in the magical place of doggy heaven, I feel like I’m handling things a little better than when I said goodbye to Duke. Maybe it’s just that I knew what was coming, and how I could better handle my emotions. But even though I’m staying strong, I do miss my boy. He was a good boy, like many other pups out there.

Here are a few things I loved about Tucker/Beau/Beaubi:

Early on, I let him sit in my lap while I sat on the floor. Fast forward to many years ahead: Hey, are you sitting on the floor? He would still attempt to sit in your lap! He was a big golden, around 89 lbs. (He might have been 91 lbs at times, shhh.)
When I’d be asleep in the morning, my dad would come up to my room to get Tucker to potty him and feed him breakfast. Tucker rarely left. He would wait until I woke up. And if he did leave, he’d run right back upstairs, barge through my dog, and jump on the bed. The lock on my door never worked after he decided to be a rhinoceros.
When my mom and I would walk the dogs together, Tucker demanded that I hold his leash. If my mom or anyone else tried to hold his leash, and I was on the walk with them, he would flat out stop moving or bite the leash until it was returned to my hands. He truly wanted to maximize any time with me.
Tucker loved bath time. I’d hand him a towel and he’d march up the stairs with it in his mouth.
Tucker also loved a baby pool. He’d splash and have fun in the water.
Tucker was a good boy in the car. He was quiet and stared out the window.
Lots of dogs liked Tucker. He must have had a very calming and neutral vibe to other dogs. I don’t think he ever got in a fight.
Tucker was a licker. Sometimes this can certainly be annoying, but I love a dog that licks. He was very affectionate. That’s probably my most favorite thing about him.

I wouldn’t be remiss if I didn’t comment on some naughty or mischievous moments from Tucker:

First thing, he was a stubborn dog. Oh my, so stubborn at times! Whether he wanted to turn around on a walk or not turn around and keep going, we just had to make sure he didn’t start biting his leash, because he bit through it many times.
Tucker ate poop. Yuck.
The phrase, “Take it nice” was derived from Tucker’s chomp when handed a treat.
I always wanted to trust Tucker off the leash. I could with his predecessor, Duke. But when I became too trusting, he’d see a deer and take off.
Beaubi Marie (full nickname here) had anxiety. This translated into him mouthing my arms a lot. In return, I would have bruises all along my arms. They were love bites! And gosh did they hurt. But I never let it bother me. I loved him so.

Through all this grieving I find myself at odds mentally, because I’m also grateful. I have a baby boy in my life (I’m a new mom) and that gives me a lot of gratitude. One story has stopped, but another one started just early enough for me to love hard on something else. Tucker was my first baby boy (in dog form). Having a (human) son is so wonderful for me during this time. And if 2020 isn’t already the year of unpredictable global events, having a baby is a blessing in life that I’m not taking for granted.

AHeinz57: a website redesign for our devoted companions

Josh and I finally did it. We got together and said, “You know what? We’re going to make this happen.” Laptops fully charged and paws freshly wiped, we successfully redesigned a non-profit website together!

This past weekend, we were super proud to launch the new website for AHeinz57 Pet Rescue & Transport. This is an organization led by a passionate and determined woman named Amy Heinz, and supported by a connected group of volunteers. AHeinz57 volunteers travel all across the midwest to transport dogs to other rescues, and then bring back others into their care. They then divide and conquer by housing some at their Pit Stop and many others in foster homes. Strays, dogs up for euthanization and owner surrenders end up in the hands of AHeinz57. Although their past lives may have been awful, the team is dogged on giving them the best new lives and finding them forever homes.

Our dog, Luna, came from AHeinz57. From the days we started searching, we would check the website and Facebook page for new additions. While the old website had a lot of information, it was not doing justice for the hardworking individuals that give many hours to the precious pups that need help. I knew that Josh and I could provide something much better, and not necessarily one of those “anything is better” situations. I knew we could plan this out and support something I find so important—BEING GOOD TO DOGS!

We started the project back in February of this year. Valentine’s Day 2017 was all about the love of dogs for us. I came up with a revised site architecture, which included recategorizing some pages and combining others that were duplicated. We also thought through the user top tasks and how to set content hierarchies, especially on the home page. With these ideas in tow, we had our initial meeting and walked away with a project!

User Top Tasks

The key tasks that users need to complete are:

Adopt
Volunteer
Donate

Adding three buttons directly below the home page hero image quickly accomplishes the visibility of these tasks, along with a new, clean look. The tasks are called out in the navigation as well, which should give users the easy ability to find the pet that is right for them, or a way to get involved with the organization.

Most users of this website spend time looking over the adoptables page, and to put it simply, Josh worked his coding whiz-magic to improve the user interface (UI) of the page. Let me just show you the tail wag-worthy improvement.

It sits nicely with us.

Website Goals and Objectives

Adoptables viewing experience

It’s simple enough to say that the pet viewing experience was a top priority. We wanted to achieve a smoother user experience (UX) for prospective adopters. Users can also now share links to AHeinz57 pets on social media, and the pet name will show up in the preview!

AHeinz57 is embarking on a million dollar capital campaign

Donations are so important to the organization right now. Construction has already started on AHeinz57’s new facility and they’re hoping to raise $1.8 million to cover the costs. We used the plugin Give to setup donations on the site and are impressed with its functionality and features. Users no longer have to ‘add a donation to cart’—modern day is good!

Events are scannable and mobile-friendly

One thing about using a traditional grid-style calendar is that it is very difficult to have a seamless mobile experience. We updated the calendar, now called events, to list out events with their appropriate color-coded category, and pointed AHeinz57 to EventBrite to manage events. Our hope is that the events page is visited often so people know what’s happening and when in the community.

This was a meaningful project for us to work together on, and we so appreciate all the help we got from the AHeinz57 team, especially Amy, Jen and Becky, among many others. Please visit the site www.aheinz57.com and consider adopting or getting involved. There are a lot of opportunities to give back to the pups that make our lives whole.

Why I say “I love you” to my dogs

I talk to my dogs a lot. It’s my own language with them, full of english, some made-up words and weird phrasing. Let me give you some examples:

“Hi honey, are you being ‘a good’?” (Hello honey, have you been behaving?)

“Oh, Feen is bein’ a bean! He’s my Feen Bean!” (Finnegan is being a silly boy. He is like my “bean” and only he and I really know what that means.)

“Hee-yah!” (Here!)

“Criss criss criss!” (Let’s cross the street right here.)

Here’s a classic:

“Hey guys, no balls on the bed, no bones on the bed, no bites on the bed, no fights on the bed.”

That one actually translates exactly to English. Assume the “always be good” mantra, dogs!

They get me. I’m pretty sure of it*.

Now, there is one phrase that I make a habit of saying, and that’s “I love you.”

When you realize your dog understands a word or phrase that you say a lot, you get an amazing feeling. It’s a sense of accomplishment. Or, let’s be honest, it may be a made-up word in your english dictionary, but it’s a word you say when you mean that one thing that you (and just you) and your dog are on the same page about.

For those beginning years, it may be “sit” or “down.” And as your relationship progresses, more meaningful sentences will start to take root. But how exactly is your dog supposed to know that when you say, “I love you” that you really mean, “I love you”?

Consistency is key

A big part is the tone of voice you use when you say the word or sentence. I believe that it really doesn’t matter what you say to your dog. What matters is that you say the same thing in the same tone of voice every single time. Higher pitched tones are associated with more acceptance, while lower pitched tones are more threatening. You could praise your dog with, “Good boy!” in a high-pitched voice, or with, “Corn maze!” in an equally high-pitched voice. Being consistent is where he will learn what you like very quickly, and will make it his goal to hear the appropriate phrase after completing an action.

For something like, “I love you”, there is more meaning behind the words. What your voice does when you say “I love you” is special. Those three words aren’t meant for everyone to hear. If you mean what you say when you say it, your dog will soon find tranquility and pure bliss from your delivery. I usually follow it up with a great big kiss, too.

“I love you” is a very strong statement. Even if all the other glib glab I speak to my dog doesn’t really make any sense, and even if the words “I love you” don’t fully resonate with my dog, there is a sentiment behind the words that transcends. I say the three words because my dogs are my family. Quite simply, I do love them and I just don’t want to hold it back! And I also make it a point to say the words frequently so that it becomes common place. I know the feeling I’m trying to convey when I say the three words. My hope is that my dogs do as well.

*Who really knows. They’ve got hot, sometimes poopy, breath.

Why process fits my personality

I’m one of those people who really likes a routine. Not necessarily doing the same thing everyday. No, that would be boring. But more waking up around the same time everyday, eating a morning banana with the dogs, driving that predictive 10-15 minutes into work, leaving at a suitable hour for lunch with the pup (pee pee), and watching a quality television program at night. And if a small gathering should pop in every once in a while, well that’s perfectly fine.

I’m sold; sign me up.

This doesn’t just balance out my home life. You’ve guessed it: I like routine in my professional career as well! I like to call this process, or a process, for taking care of necessary business. Keeping projects on tighter than tight schedules, on budget and under control. It’s what keeps those knots in my upper shoulders/neck region stronger than ever.

A process to handle various situations is what keeps me going when managing multiple projects at once. Without process, I would literally be a screaming monkey.

But processes don’t always work out. It’s just the nature of the game, kids. I think the typical reason is due to communication. And it may not be internal—it could be something you were unable to control. Variability. Unpredictability.

Oh process, what are you even good for?

This is key in my pivot here. Ever heard, “People over process”?

This phrase is common in the Agile Methodology where “Individuals and interactions over processes and tools” is the first bullet in the list. This method of course spins me both ways since I value people, their thoughts and feelings. And I want people to collaborate, share their thoughts and make cool products without that feeling of constraint. But I also know that in the advertising, marketing and web world it is difficult to obtain new work without demonstrating that you know what you’re doing (sometimes known as, “What’s your process to get this done, sir?”)

So it’s just a little struggle. It’s where I look to let a little more flexibility into my process-driven workflow. Because, why not?

The more time and experience you have with something, especially the people you’re working with, hopefully the more predictive they will be, and thus, less process needed. But if things derail, because why not, then reel those fish in again.

What about dogs? How do they fit into this?

Oh lots of ways and thank you for letting me end with this thought. Balance, routine and process. Happy dogs. But the simple thing here is trust. Why would anyone follow your lead unless they could trust you? Dogs will do a lot more for you if they can trust you. So you need people to trust your process. Gain some trust and then let them run off leash for a bit.

Image via freeimages.com

Giving a little thought to imprinting and dog love

If you have been keeping up with the Internet lately, you should know that a new puppy has graced my (and Josh’s) life.

Meet Luna

Luna - dog — Luna is a Great Pyrenees mix. Dad is unknown.

We adopted Luna from Aheinz 57, a local pet rescue. We love our little girl, and you know what? She really loves us.

When we first brought her home, we had a very scared pup on our hands. Luna and her littermates had not been handled by people very much, so she was justified to be a little weary of two humans encroaching on her space.

But within an hour of having her home, I saw that little, curly tail start to wag. The trust was starting to build, and my gosh, a rub on the belly feels pretty good!

I look at this small period of time as one of the most crucial periods a new owner has with her pet. Compare it to imprinting.

For precocial animals (think bird species such as ducks, chickens and turkeys), imprinting comes at a very young age. Filial imprinting, as it is called, happens at a specific interval of time in the baby animal’s life. Researchers have found that it varies, from a range of the first few minutes to the first few hours to even many days into the youngling’s new life.

During this critical period of time, certain stimuli act as releasers for certain innate responses, which allow the baby to imprint on its mother and later in life, determine who it will find attractive when mating.

What’s really interesting about imprinting is that it’s not always the true mother of the baby that gets imprinted upon. A chicken could imprint on a duck. Or a stick. (Yes, it could be an inanimate object!)

Once imprinted on an animal in filial imprinting, it cannot imprint on another animal. No reprinting!

This “molding of the mind” is a sensitive time that sets up the rest of that animal’s life. It determines their attachments and likelihood of survival in the wild.

Let’s open up the narrow window of imprinting and expand the idea to the act of adopting a dog.

When you bring your new best friend home, there is a special “imprinting” time for him to get used to you. To see you as his caretaker—his mother or father. It’s such a crucial period because you are setting the precedent for how highly emotional and scary moments will be handled going forward. You may not realize it, but what you do over the next few hours to few days will shape the level of trust that this dog will have for you. And over the coming months, your every move and decisions will slowly merge into routines for the dog.

Bonding is very important. Can I give you some advice? Shower this dog with love! When we brought Luna home, I tried to hold her a much as I could, just to get more skin-to-skin contact. She stopped being so wiggly in the air and started to look me in the eyes.

It’s this “imprinting” period that will begin your bond with this dog for the next many years.

Little fun fact: why should you wait until eight weeks old to bring home your new puppy? Dogs have a critical period of imprinting from four to eight weeks with their mother. Much of the puppy’s temperament will be determined when it is six to eight weeks old. There is much learning and socialization to happen before eight weeks of age, and this is a crucial “dog learning time” for the pup. His brain will continue to have many key milestones of development through four months of age, which makes the human relationship critical once brought home.

Stress, sniffs and the dog

Our world is incredibly fast-paced. In turn that means anybody with things to do gets stressed. Stress naturally falls in that space between the base of your neck and the middle-to-edge part of your shoulder. And it sits there and just radiates. And you think about it. Knead it awkwardly with your opposite hand. Maybe try and balance an ice pack right there. Ok, but now you have a client meeting. How about a pain patch? Alright that settles it for now.

At the end of the day, it’s essential to have some kind of work-life balance. You close one door and open another. That’s possible, right?

In the event that it’s not, you need outlets to deal with stress. In sickness and in health, I want you to remember the dog.

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.

― Josh Billings

It’s widely known that dogs interpret and follow our energies very closely. They watch for cues all the time relative to our eyes, body language, gestures and tone of voice. The mental and physical benefits of having a companion at your side are outstanding and save lives daily for those who have it harder than others.

One of the neatest things about dogs is their sense of smell. Dogs have a sense of smell 10,000 to 100,000 times as acute as our own. When it comes to their noses, dogs have up to 300 million olfactory receptors, whereas humans have about six million. So when it’s time to sniff out the drugs, yeah, a dog is a pretty solid team member.

Why bring up the smells? Because dogs can smell our stress. Ah-ha, tricky!

The stress hormone is called cortisol. Elevated levels of this hormone can lead to health issues such as a lowered immune function, increased cholesterol, high blood pressure, depression, heart disease…

When your body has that fight-or-flight mechanism, you release cortisol. If you’re me, this is when you grab an ice pack and tell your shoulders to RELAX.

Now there is good stress and bad stress of course, with good stress firing you up under pressure to complete some kind of goal. But too much bad stress built up without release is bad for us. And you know what, nobody wins from within in that game.

Dogs detect rising cortisol levels in our sweat and breath, thus knowing when our stress is starting to rise. Sometimes service dogs are trained just for this reason to detect elevated stress levels in humans.

It’s amazing to think that that with just a sniff, a dog can immediately understand you more deeply than anyone else. And if there is one thing on this earth that can understand you, it’s a dog.

Beyond the sniffing, dogs are excellent stress relievers in numerous ways. Consider the benefits of exercise with a daily walk, meeting new people with a cute puppy to focus the conversation on, and adding routine to your life in general. Sometimes the best way to relieve some angst is to shift the focus from yourself to something else – and yes I’m talking about taking care of your dog. It’s his lunchtime.

One last thing: being financially smart is important. So if you can financially and responsibly afford a dog, then congrats! You’re getting a new best friend.

“Dogs aren’t our whole life, but they make our lives whole.”

― Roger Caras

Image via pinterest.com

A pup point: the strive for a balanced life

Tucker and Duke in car — Golden retrievers Tucker and Duke enjoying a spacious ride to Colorado.

Can you believe it? I am a dog lover? I think they are the best?

It’s true. I love dogs. Especially the big ones, and the seniors/senoras. Hey, there is history in those eyes!

The key to a happy dog is a balanced life. Just ask Cesar Millan. Any dog can achieve this with the right surroundings. Pair an unbalanced dog with a stressful life, and things fall apart. And hey, this applies to people, too.

Striving for a balanced life is no easy task. There are endless things that can throw us off, piss us off, and excite us too much. But I invite you to let your dog be your teacher. After all, dogs helped humans hunt back in the day, and without them, we’d be goners.

You can learn a lot from your dog. Learn how to trust people. Learn to be loyal. Learn to obey. Learn to lick.

But I think something we as fine people so often fail to learn is being present. Just living in the moment, not dwelling on the past or preparing for the future. Just having a conversation, painting some wood, having a jam sesh…whatever… and not worrying that wasting time is time wasted.

Dogs are masters of living in the present. As an owner, everything you do for your dog makes their day. From feeding them breakfast, to going for a walk, to settling down for a nice spoon and nap. It’s all their favorite thing, and you are their favorite person. What an honor!

Part of the reason dogs are “master present livers” is that they don’t know what’s ahead. They can only observe what is happening in the now. Dogs interpret our energies, but they don’t know the reasons behind our feelings. And certainly, they never forget a bad past experience. However, the bad feelings can disappear once balance is brought back into life.

Observing the attitudes of dogs has changed me as a person. When my family got our first golden retriever, I became a dog lover very quickly. And to this day, I stand by saying our dog Duke changed my life. He became the first thing I loved that wasn’t in my immediate family. He lived to be 15 years old. When he died, I lost a family member. And a huge portion of my life was now just “gone.”

But not to dwell on the past. See, I’m doing it already! When Duke was 10, we got another golden retriever, Tucker. Tucker is my boy. And if you know me, well, you know how close Tucker T and I are. Like little magnets for your Saturday afternoon craft project. When he is balanced, I am happy.

So, what do I say. I say that dogs have a real effect on us people. It’s hard to put into words, because all relationships with pets are a little different. But a bond with a dog teaches you (or should teach you) to be nice, thankful and to live in the moment. We can learn a lot from our dogs.

The best things in life have four legs, lots of fur, and aren’t afraid to French kiss.

– Me

Thank you.